Eyes on the Enemy: Florida State football rival report

I’m back! Just add me to the list of things that’ve come back before the U.

Big thanks to Juan, who did a great job of filling in for me last week, taking things up to a weirder and better notch than I could have ever hoped to do, in a sense rendering me the Deondre Francois to his James Blackman. I’m like 80 percent sure that he poisoned me for the opportunity to do so, with the other 20 percent assuming my body was just physically reacting to the 2018 Florida State season.

On that note, let’s dive in.

Clemson

Going up against the Fighting Addazios, Clemson actually had its second-closest game of the season, leading only 13-7 at halftime before winning by 20 points. Trevor Lawrence put up relatively pedestrian numbers, registering just 295 yards, a touchdown and an interception, as well as earning another score on the ground.

The Tigers wrapped up the Atlantic Division for the fourth straight year, with its senior class having gone 23-1 in division play. Again, totally not bitter writing that sentence out, in any way, shape, or form.

If this was 2012, we could probably joke about the fact that Clemson was due to slip up against Duke or South CaroMuschamp, but now, we can only say that it won’t happen in hopes of instituting a reverse jinx. How the turntables indeed.

Clemson takes on Duke at 7 p.m., with a spread of 28 currently in the Tigers’ favor.

Miami

Ah, yes. The Hurricanes have taken on the role abdicated by Florida last season, which is, “Team Hilariously Dysfunctional Enough To Deflect From the Reality of Florida State’s Season.”

Miami lost again on Saturday, this time falling to a Georgia Tech team that completed as many passes as the Hurricanes had lost fumbles (three). N’Kosi Parray finally got his shot again, and produced an extremely impressive 165 yards and no touchdowns. The “if you’ve got two quarterbacks, you’ve got none” cliche has never been more applicable, given the way that Mark Richt has bumbled the management of his passers. Former Miami players are starting to speak out against Richt, including, for some reason, a former Homeland Security officer?

Most of the criticism surrounding the Christian Cane, outside of quarterback mishandling, has centered around the fact that he’s refused to give up playcalling, or even acknowledge that there’s an issue, a heartwarming and touching way of honoring John James Fisher Jr.

In other news, the Hurricanes finally settled with Arkansas State, getting footed with a bill of $600,000 that will definitely put a further damper on the hopes of those advocating for Marky Mark’s firing.

And then, for giggles, here’s a sample of State of the U’s recruiting reaction takes today:

Miami takes on Virginia Tech on the road at 3:30 p.m. on Saturday, with a spread of 5.5 sitting in the Hurricanes’ favor.

Florida

It seems like maybe Florida’s fans weren’t too happy about their quarterback shushing them last week:

At this point, might as well call Franks Dylan Toback, since his most defining characteristic is “man who shushes.” (I hope all seven out of the 12 people that read this column who get that reference appreciate it.)

Florida squeaked out another close victory, this time in the WILL MUSCHAMP REVENGE BOWL PART 3 that was actually a pretty fun game to watch, albeit frustrating.

With Idaho on the schedule this week, a game that would be more interesting if the Gators were playing an actual sack of potatoes, the eyes of a weary Gator nation can begin to turn towards Doak Campbell Stadium, where next week, Florida will get the opportunity to either lose to a bowl-deficient team, or be the stepping stone to keep the streak going. (My therapist told me positive manifestation is a good thing to practice.)

The Gators take on Idaho at 12 p.m. on Saturday, with the game set to be televised on ESPNU.